Renaming and Re-framing Our Story

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The other day my Boyfriend and I were watching a video about the weeks Astrological forecast from Karen Curry, who wrote Understanding Human Design. She mentioned something about not getting stuck in your story.  After we finished watching it, my boyfriend said, Oh, now I see where you get the story thing. I responded with, no, the “story thing” does not come from her, many coaches and spiritual practices talk about your story. Landmark Education and Byron Katie for example. It is not new, and Karen Curry was using it as an example. Well, a whole conversation ensued around stories.

My boyfriend made a great distinction for me around how I label my story. ( And I must admit I was not totally willing at first to let go of the story about my story) He brought to my attention that when I refer to my story, or call him on having a story about something, it has a negative connotation. Good Aha moment!

If we are the creator of our reality, then living from or having a past negative story carries over. We can make a story about anything. In fact, as humans, we do! We create stories to enhance our lives, we create stories to sabotage our lives, we create stories to design businesses, websites, inventions and travel arrangements. Our lives are stories. Why then was I always, and I mean always, looking at my story or any story as negative?

My boyfriend asked me, when would a story benefit you? I got flustered at first and felt put on the spot. I felt he was pressuring me to answer without getting to think. I could not even think of how a story could benefit me. I was having test anxiety. He said, take one minute and think of one way a story can benefit you. So, I took a breath and thought of the worst case scenario. OK, I said, for survival. If I were kidnapped and held hostage in a dark garage by creepy, shady men who were threatening to kill me and rape me. A story to benefit me would be that I could and would escape. That I would be found and released, that I would live and the men would be killed or severely punished.

Aha! Good answer, he said. I was actually surprised at the creation of such a story in the first place, and then realized even though I used a negative survival situation, it was a positive story. Then I realized that stories can be negative and positive, and that I had focused on the negative aspect of all stories to be something to release and get rid of. This is something I continually welcome, releasing anything and everything that does not serve me. So, I really looked at that great distinction. Why did I look at my stories as negative, and how can I re-frame and make them positive?

The stories that I carry with me from my past that I have identified with are just that , stories from my past that I have identified with, and made something into. I do not need to carry them with me and be identified by them. I can put them in the bucket of things that don’t serve me and drop them in the nearest dumpster.

The story I want is a good, positive one that I identify with. I am an intelligent, empowered woman who can and does drop her negative story to create for herself a life she loves and has everything she requires with joy, ease, grace and disposable income! Yeeha!

Of course I said! Stories can be negative and positive! I choose to be positive! I choose to create my own reality in a positive, affirming way which supports me in following through with what I am passionate about. Releasing limiting beliefs, getting rid of everything that no longer serves me, walking my walk and talking my talk.

Recently, I have felt so stuck in my negative story, I was paralyzed. I was so paralyzed by my negative story, I tweaked my back and could barely move. I was in great pain and could hardly do anything but lay on ice. Hmmm- My story was so negative and so deep and I was so identified with it my body felt it and reacted physically to how I was thinking. I created physically in my body my reality that I had created from my negative story.

The good story is, my willingness and awareness are at the forefront of my transformation. I want to be happy!  I want to heal! I want to learn! Do I know everything? No! Am I perfect? Certainly not! Can I do it alone? Not always! This is why I choose to be in relationship I see it as a spiritual practice. I am grateful for all opportunities when I can change and re-frame my negative story to a positive one, and  to be continually evolving my positive story. I know that every time I do I heal. I am happier, more aware and more conscious of myself and how I relate with others.

We make stories about everything in our lives. Food is a huge area of our lives we create stories about. Dieting is a big one. How we eat, what we put into our mouths as fuel, and what we will “settle” for as nutrition are big stories that we live over and over again each day; each time we eat. Making a choice to eat well and follow through with that choice is a good story. Staying stuck in the old negative story about what we “should” eat is not a good story. Being able to look at what we choose to eat and having the awareness around where we may have a story is also great awareness.

Every time we choose awareness we learn, we heal, we feel better.

This is why I am here. This is the truth in living and being the best person I can be!

Take a step forward to a good story and choose better eating habits and better food choices! That is a great way to move forward in a new year!

This is the best story I know!

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