Something I strongly believe in right now is my abiliy to evolve, transcend, overcome and grow. I am a spiritual being having a ridiculous human experience.
Why ridiculous you ask?
Well, how much time have you got? Let me see if I can explain it to you as I figure it out for myself.
I am an evolving work in progress; we all are.
When someone asks, ” how’s it goin?” I often respond with, ” it’s going and everyday is different.” Which is often true of feelings and emotions but not necessarily daily routines and activities.
Every morning when I wake up I do not know how I will feel. I always intend I will feel well, happy, content, safe, motivated and productive. My experience does not usually match my intention. I always have high intention ( and I mean always)
I feel my thoughts and intentions are directly connected to this planet, this world, this atmosphere, this unfathomable universal energy. I know that I am SO much greater than my silly human self. I feel that I am here for a reason and that every move, every decision I make, every person I come into contact with is ALL happening, being created or presented for a reason. So, why do I say silly or ridiculous? Because, even though I know this about my life, myself, my connection, I often some how act or say something that appears I have no clue!
My perspective, observation or deduction of this has no basis for ” reality.” I act, speak, interact, react in the moment. My human self speaks before I integrate or contemplate my always intention to be my best, highest, most connected self. I then soar off with the response, the flow of the moment. Is this always my best self; unfortunately no.
Something I believe right now is, how can we know what we don’t know? How could it be any other way than the energy of the universe holds SO many more mysteries than we can possibly understand or fathom?
Something I strongly believe right now is, faith, love, healing, growth and the ability to rise up and embody them all. I have always had this belief, this intention of myself of how to be, who to be. Why then do I slip, faulter and get terribly, terribly lost?
I forget.
For me to say that is monumental. I pride myself in my good memory. I remember almost everything, I notice almost everything. So then, how could I forget? This is where the silly, ridiculous human who is clueless to the connected spiritual being comes out. [ This sounds like a Gemini, HA!]
I now further digress. I love being me! I am extremely unique, special and I know / feel I am here for many reasons. This puts me in an unusual place. Does everyone know this, feel this, observe this about themselves? Perhaps, but I do not think so.
The way I show up and display it is different, but I believe human beings are intrinsically good, so we strive to be something good not necessarily knowing why.
I have imagined, envisioned, dreamed and meditated on being interviewed about my experience. How I came to understand all of this about myself. How I found the words to express all of who I am, to be understood by so many. I respond, ” I write what I feel, I write what I observe in myself.”
I have learned that I am not alone. I am connected to everyone who is or has felt this way. That is the awareness! That is the spiritual being, the wisdom.
My silly, ridiculous human self is the one who doubts, argues, questions, doesn’t respond, clams up, lashes out, reacts, yells, does not take responsibility, aquiesces. All the while knowing deep down I just forgot, again!
Something I strongly believe right now is, this is all good. This awareness is the connection, the spark, the synapse, the thread. It is all me. The blend of the deep spiritual wisdom and the neophite human with no clue. Gemini or not!
This blob of human tissue, cells, blood, bones, skin, ideas , thoughts, insights and ponderings are uniquely, all encompassing me. We are all of us just that. We are all uniquely, all encompassing ourselves; like no other.
What do I do with this awareness? I continue to explore and discover more.
Something I strongly believe right now is, the awareness is the path to continued discovery, to self redemption. The awareness is also the discovery. As long as I continue to be aware and have awareness, I am moving forward. I am in dynamic motion.
Awareness brings change.
Awareness brings transformation.
Awareness brings evolution.
Awareness brings expansion.
Awareness brings relief.
Awareness brings surrender.
Awareness brings willingness.
Awareness brings remembering.
Awareness brings me back full circle to the connection of my spiritual being integrating my silly human self.
This is my life, this is my path of choice.
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